Motherly Advice – PAY ATTENTION!!!

Posted 6/17/08

What do you mean “What do you mean you broke your leg?”   I thought you knew that!  Well, here’s the story…

If you go to wikipedia and type in “Break a leg”, one of the many (one) response(s) that pop(s) up will be:

“Break a leg” is a well-known saying in theatre which means “good luck“. It is typically said to actors before they go out onto stage to perform.

The expression reflects a theatrical superstition in which wishing a person “good luck” is considered bad luck. The expression is sometimes used outside the theatre as superstitions and customs travel through other professions and then into common use.”

Hence, when my mom told me to “break a leg” (generally considered a bad thing), she was, in fact, saying “good luck”, (generally considered a good thing.  Unless you are an actor or other performer, in which case the term “good luck” is generally considered a bad thing and to tell someone to “break a leg” is considered good.)

And, as it turned out, good luck (broken leggedness) prevailed – especially since we had to work so hard to be blessed with the luck. 

Another lesson in life:  The harder you work, the luckier you get… Or you could say that “If you try real hard, you’ll end up with a broken leg.”

“Wait a minute,” you say, “You only came in third.”

You’re right!  We DID come in third.  But if you frame it such that we probably only came in third at our first gig, and we were the only entertainment, then coming in third at our second gig was a huge improvement…

…And that’s how we looked at it….  

  • The first time we came in third out of a field of one (we were that bad).
  • The second time we came in third out of a field of seven (we were that much better).

We felt victorious… 

We continued practicing at the same rate, learning more songs.  And we also got some small jobs playing at parties, and the occasional school dance. 

We also started going to dances and other events where there were other bands performing, just to watch them, get some ideas on new songs to learn and learn some stage presence.  Scouting the competition, as it were…

One memorable Friday night, the Ventura Recreation Center was having a dance.  The band was one that we had not seen, but had heard was pretty good, so we all decided to go and check them out to see if we could come away with some good tips.  None of us was old enough to drive, yet, and it was several miles from Scott’s house.  We decided not to ask Scott’s dad for a ride and elected to walk…

Back in those days, there was still a fair chunk of open space in Ventura, including lots of citrus groves and a few small farms, etc.  We decided to take a short-cut along a more “rural” route. 

It had turned dark and we were walking along,  joking around,  talking “band” talk and generally having a good time when the inevitable happened… Someone had to “relieve” himself…  I don’t remember who it was – not me, though.  But, hey, we were out in the middle of nowhere with several miles still to traverse before we arrived at the Rec Center, it was dark, and when you gotta go, you gotta go.  So whoever had to go, went.  That caused a couple of others to have to go, too, so they also went. 

This illustrates another mathematical law:  

  • The Commutative Property of ‘I Have To Go To The Bathroom and There Is No Bathroom Around In Which To Do This and No Prospects of Finding One Soon’ 

Havert was good at math, so he decided that it was also his time to go. So he did…  Right onto an electric fence…    

I don’t believe I’ve ever heard another sound quite like the sound Havert Seally made when he did that.  I don’t really know how to describe it…  It was… not of this world… 

But, of course, the rest of us fell on the ground laughing, and we continued to do so ’til our stomachs hurt and there just wasn’t any more laughter left in us…  Somehow, Havert failed to immediately see the humor in the situation, though he was more open to it later on… 

This became permanently etched in my mind as “Havert Seally and the Electric fence Incident”…  And I’m still laughing… 

(***At the risk of introducing a bit of crudity into this chapter, I am about to type a word that may be offensive to some.  If you are one who may take offence, please skip the next paragraph…  And please don’t hold it against me – it has to be said…)

There are many ways to call attention to yourself…  Whizzing on an electric fence is not at the top of the list of the best ways to do it…   

…However, It does bring to mind a lesson that my mother taught me: 

  • Always go to the bathroom BEFORE you leave the house… 

Having witnessed the possible consequences of failing to follow motherly advice in this area, I have become an expert at always going to the bathroom before I leave the house…   

Thank you, Havert, for serving as my roll model…  Bzzzzzzt!   

This event was followed by the naturally expected jokes concerning the consequences of having made this kind of mistake.  The ones that seemed to stick best were the ones that had to do with his new speaking voice…  Kinda high… 

Enter The Beach Boys… 

As mentioned earlier, I am a Beach Boys fan, an enthusiasm, sadly,  not shared by the rest of the band members.  As a result of everybody else’s ambivalence toward America’s Band, we didn’t have any Beach Boys songs on our list of music.  One of the “reasons” given by the guys was that we didn’t have anybody who could sing the high parts…   

The Electric Fence Incident did more than give us all (well, almost all) a great laugh – the jokes that followed it gave me an idea…  Maybe Havert could now sing the high parts! 

Unbelievably, Havert didn’t know any Beach Boys music – He had never heard them.  He really hadn’t.  I was amazed…   

BUT I could fix that – I had every Beach Boys album ever made, and I was going to make sure that Havert would hear them and practice the songs before I brought it up to the other guys again.  When they repeated the excuse that we can’t sing them, I would have Havert demonstrate that we COULD sing them…  It was going to be great… 

The next week, I brought all of my Beach Boys albums to Havert… 

The week after that he moved to Bakersfield.   

With my Beach Boys Albums…. 

Exit The Beach Boys… 

Enter the Roamin’ Four…

________________________________________________

Next:  NOW what do we do???…

To go to Chapter 17, follow this link>>>

https://billkammerer.wordpress.com/17-bio-chapter-17/

To hear actual non-church related songs by Bill Kammerer, Click on this link

https://billkammerer.wordpress.com/some-non-church-related-songs-by-bill-kammerer/

To hear actual songs by Bill Kammerer with a spiritual emphasis, click on this link

https://billkammerer.wordpress.com/my-catholicchristian-songs-in-mp3-format/

 

If you would like to contact me directly, just click on the email address below, or send me an email from your own email account. my email address is: 

billk@sti.net

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One Response to “16 – Bio – Chapter 16”

  1. Kathleen Marsh Says:

    How could anyone not hear of the Beach Boys? What kind of animal is this Havert, anyway?

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