Conversations With Judy – Episode One: Pillow Talk

It was a dark and snoozy night…

Twenty minutes ago, I was sound asleep happily dreaming of my new Sears Craftsman Model 79186 Weedwhacker Gas Trimmer with the 32cc 2-Cycle Engine, Incredi-Pull – P2 Technology, Hassle Free Cutting Head, and Convertible Attachment System*, when I was awakened by the feel of my wife’s hand groping my own hand (which was somehow vertically situated above her head, leaning up against the headboard) and following it along down to the top of my head, as if she was trying to figure out what this thing was…

And then she said, “What are YOU doing here?”

“Oh, I’m here this time most every night … What do you mean what am I doing here? Where do you think we are?”

“I’m on the couch. What are you doing standing behind it?”

“You may be on the couch, but I’m in bed asleep.”

“Really? What time is it?”


Dead silence… then she started laughing and said “Sorry for waking you – I thought I was on the couch reading my book and you were the cat.”

“You woke me up for this?”

Then she went back to sleep.

Now she is sawing Zs and I’m wide awake writing this stupid story…

* Really – I was – I’m now convinced that I am no longer a teen-ager…


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