Alpaca Facts – Chapter One: Let’s Go To An Alpaca Event!

Well, friends, it’s time to embark on another adventure into the wonderful world of Animals. This time, we are going to learn all about an animal near and dear to my own heart (they became that way yesterday), the Alpaca.

The Alpaca,” you ask?

Yes! The Alpaca,” I answer.

What is an Alpaca? Well, It’s kinda hard to describe unless you have seen one. Fortunately, I have seen one. In fact, I have seen several – all of them yesterday.

Thinking about it, it’s even hard to describe an Alpaca even if you have seen one. Or more. But they look kinda like a cross between a camel and a shetland pony. And if that doesn’t help, they also smell like a cross between a camel and a shetland pony.

Does that help?

Maybe this will help…

As we will see down the road, Alpacas come in a variety of sizes, colors and hair styles. But they all have the same number of humps – Zero.

This Alpaca (dubbed “Ringo” by my wife, Judy) is a fine example of a “Rock Star Alpaca”, as delineated by the hair style made famous by some 1960s rock group or other.

But I digress…

Why did I see several Alpacas yesterday?

I’ll tell you…

It all started when Judy and I were paying for our meal at China Delight a couple of weeks ago. We were standing at the cash register, and there it was, ensconced in the traditional “Free Rag” stand that you will see in many retail outlets.  The ubiquitous (in our area, anyway) Java Mountain News.

We really should avoid picking up the Java Mountain News but, as I said, it’s free…  And, besides, that’s where I got the idea for Cow Facts, one of my biggest hits on this site.

(Truth be told, I had been looking to the JMN for years in hopes of lightning striking twice and have been consistently disappointed in the content since the “Cow Facts” issue. I ceased reading it a couple of years ago because I couldn’t stand the frustration any longer.)

But I digress, yet again…

Judy decided that it was time to pick up another issue and did so.

And, like last time, nothing happened with it until a week.5 later when she needed something to read in the porcelain closet. Aparantly, she was so impressed by an ad that she left the JMN there, opened to the ad, for the next occupant to read and ponder.

Seeing as there are only two people currently residing at our house, I was the next occupant.

I read.

I pondered.

I immediately forgot all about it. 

Judy, on the other hand, is not one to forget an ad that looks like this:


So, when she and I were in the back yard yesterday draging dead trees from where they were to the vicinity of the burn pit, she said, “Hey – when we’re done here, you want to go see the Alpacas?”

Who are the Alpacas? Do we know them from church or do you work with one of them?”

Neither. They are animals and they live on a ranch in North Fork.”

What kind of animals?”

They’re hard to describe unless you’ve ever seen one.”

Wait a minute. Did you leave an ad in front of the throne?”

Yeah – that’s what they look like.”

How do they see? They don’t have eyes. Do they use sonar – like bats?””

Maybe that’s one of the many things we can learn about them when we go there.”

I think I have plans. I need to polish my nails. Or something. Maybe wash my hair.”

Come on! It will be fun!”

So is washing my hair.”

The “Look”…

OK. Let’s go see the Alpacas…”

To be continued…



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: